Let Me Watch that for You: Condemned


Directed By: Eli Morgan Gesner
Written By: Eli Morgan Gesner
Released: November 13, 2013
Runtime: 83 Minutes
Watch this on: Netflix

Condemned is a 2015 American horror movie following rich-girl Maya who runs away from her wealthy parents to stay with her punk rocker boyfriend and his bandmates in a condemned apartment complex. After a bad batch of speed starts to transform the tenants into blood thirsty maniacs the kids fight to escape the building.

Ok, where to begin, this was a real weird one. It took me half of the movie to realize that they were intentionally trying to be funny instead of it being unintentionally funny because of how goofy all of it is. The other tenants in the building run the gamut of nefarious characters; drug dealers, junkies, prostitutes and pimps. The best way to describe the “zombies” would be imagine the infected from “28 Days Later but cover them in weird crusty boils. The make up effects are ok and there were no expenses spared in the slime and goo department. The characters are over the top and the dialogue is fairly goofy but it works with the tone of the movie. Once the tenants start turning it gets very violent pretty quick, even the violence has a slapstick sort of cartoonish vibe to it and there are some actual laugh out loud moments.

I wasn’t going to recommend this movie right after i watched it, however after sitting on it for a day I’m giving it a recommendation. Give this a watch if you want to see a fairly original take on the zombie genre, if you are in the mood for buckets of blood, goo and slime and if you are all about multiple mentions of Gene Simmon’s trademark axe bass guitar.

Grade: 6/10

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