Schlock du Jour (NSFW): Cannibal Hookers (2020)

EBE69149-7860-41F8-A106-E574B4AA28F4

directed by Donald Farmer

It’s probably safe to assume that cannibal flicks reached peak notoreity in 1980 with the release of a certain CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST.
And look, I’ve heard of CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST, but this is ridiculo—well… it’s kinda sexy actually. And the cannibals in CANNIBAL HOOKERS aren’t the jungle variety. Unless you count the concrete jungle, of course.
But let’s stop for a minute to clear up any potential confusion. Some of you more seasoned schlocksters might remember a little shot-on-video gem made by Donald Farmer in 1987 called CANNIBAL HOOKERS. Well, 33 years later, Donald Farmer makes a new movie called…CANNIBAL HOOKERS…again! I’m not complaining, I’ll take piles of supple mounds and showers of Herschell Gordon Lewis calibre blood on screen whenever and wherever those things are offered.
246133C8-AD41-418C-BEA3-B5768ADE3F2C
Here lies actress Jessa Flux as the Ample-chested ringleader of the cannibal hookers.
There’s not so much a linear story here other than Kasper Meltedhair’s character (along with her Tim and Eric tattoos) becoming a cannibal and learning to live with the other flesh eating women of the night. The movie is mostly girls hanging out doing all manner of things such as playing games at the arcade, driving go-karts, riding a carousel, and eating men.
EB201660-93DC-4629-8EDC-0A59ACD3A5B6
Eh… I’m sure he deserved it.
This movie feels like it was torn directly from the early nineties. I can’t place my finger on why. Perhaps it was the arcade, the go-karts, and the simplicity of it all. Notably, Farmer uses more establishing shots and is more experimental with editing than in previous movies, making for an above average schlock viewing experience.
B2F7491E-C5A5-4FC2-8D83-C5C60AD8CAF0
Cacia Rose played one of the cannibal hooker brood, and was a breath of fresh air.  She was interesting to look at and had a dreamy disposition that elevated the overall vibe of the movie. Consider me a fast fan.
BB76A77E-7995-4D95-B788-041058CFAEDC
What will $20 get me?
F82045DC-7E11-4B62-AA11-F530818E0272
Oh.
The special effects all look pretty dry. The intestines and hearts shown on screen just aren’t bloody enough. I also found Kasper Meltedhair very distracting. Her personality was that of a very naive schoolgirl who grew up on Disney movies, but her style was that of a give-no-fucks punker chick who won’t stop shoving the Cro-Mags in your face. Not that any of that is really an issue, it just didn’t agree with me. But credit where it’s due, she did give it her all, and I thought she was better here than in HOOKER WITH A HACKSAW.
95C0A0EE-9336-4919-9168-16B7B7EAF410
All in all if you stay up all hours of the night watching that sweet sweet trash, then go ahead and let CANNIBAL HOOKERS turn a trick on you. It won’t hurt… much.
-Elliot Ian Rat
BE375D85-140D-4F6C-BCE5-BA410CE89EF8

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s