Directed by: Matt Jaissleruntime: 72 mins. I know I’ve been inactive for awhile. I had to go away. During that time I’ve learned and grown. Yeah, it’s true! And I’ve watched such awe-inspiring features as TITANIC 666 and SORORITY SLAUGHTER. Yet I realize I haven’t been here to provide you the chuckles and yuks you’ve … More Review: The Necro Files (1997)
The Merits of Sin…The Book Spook du Jour alum and oddball cinema connoisseur Brennan Dortch has published his first book, which is a mighty doozy mind you, and so I figured it would behoove me to say a few words: There’s a shit ton of heart and a severe lack of narrative control which is … More The Merits of Sin…The Book
Virtues: Bloody Bloody Bible Camp fills every promise it makes in its premise and title. It’s a campy camp slasher with a biblical twist. There are quite a few top-notch kills, my favorite probably being this one: Take a drink for every dick joke and you’ll get to where you need to be to enjoy … More A Red-Letter Review of Vito Trabucco’s Bloody Bloody Bible Camp (2012)
Directed by Donald G. Jackson (Rollergator) “Written” by Scott Shaw. This introductory paragraph may be an intro to the intro but I don’t care right now. Firstly, this is not the 1999 film Ride with the Devil by Ang Lee. No, far from it. Second, if I sound a little cranky throughout this review, it’s … More Schlock du Jour: Ride with the Devil (1999)
As I write this, the world is on fire. While I hope a resplendent phoenix rises from the ashes, I do find myself needing a brief reprieve from all of the facebook arguments and live media coverage. So what do I do? Naturally I turn to my comfort zone and watch a movie. A movie … More Schlock du Jour: Lobster Man from Mars (1989)
Direct to dvd madness was in full swing as the millennium kicked in the door like a drunk daddy on a cocaine binge. Video stores were stocked to high hell with bottom shelf loveliness mass produced for a hungry horror market. Slashers were cheap as hell to make, giant animals rendered to life with defunct … More (Amazon) Prime Grime: A Rogues Gallery of Crap Part One
I used to be an avid churchgoer, back when I was “born-again.” The years of 2004-2011 consisted of me being holier than thou as I strutted around the youth group or the college group with earrings in my ears like the bad boy of the Evangelicals. It kept me out of trouble, but it made … More Schlock du Jour: The VelociPastor (2018)
I’ve been off the grid for a little while thanks to a cocktail of rampant migraines and neverending car troubles. Just call me Tetsuo: The Engine Man until further notice. I also published my first book of poetry called MYSTICS & VIXENS which I will plug now: I have watched many films during my sabbatical, … More Schlock du Jour: Sadistic Eroticism (2012)
Do you have qualms with sexy babes playing in a cemetery, sexual acts, or vhs fetishism? How about bootlicking, lesbian vampires, and pervy sex demons with 18 inch ding-dongs? If you answered yes to one or more of these things, you’d be better off avoiding NAUGHTY DIRTY NASTY, as it’s a medley of the same. … More Schlock du Jour: Naughty Dirty Nasty (2014)
Knowing that those around me have witnessed my floundering lows makes me feel…exposed. Even once the depression cycle has ended, I have to exist knowing that they have seen me in that state. It is for this reason that Schlock is my friend. Schlock doesn’t judge. Schlock only supports me. Schlock is love. Shlock is … More Schlock du Jour: Who Killed Captain Alex? (2010)
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