“You think the world is being governed by a giant asshole?” That’s one of the handful of questions some pompous jag-bag ponders in the opening scene. Talking to us like we’re some kindhearted soul who just came over to check on our “artist” friend’s well-being. I have no answer for that question. But I can … More The Merits of Sin: Gorgasm (1990) (USA)
A bum’s cocaine party is rudely interrupted by the falling body of a young woman. Her splattery demise is ruled a suicide but a well dressed junior detective wants to know more. A world weary not so junior detective wishes to call it a day but it seems the dead woman left a tape recorder … More The Merits of Sin: Psycho Scarecrow (1996) (Canada)
Season two of Baywatch Nights leaves a wave (ahem) of confusion in its wake (ahem ahem). But this is the kind of confusion I am deeply in love with. Baywatch, in its initial run, was a show about lifeguards and breasts. It was fine at being that. It also had David Hasselhoff. Knight Rider … More The Nights Will Never Be the Same, or Cocaine Fuels the Imagination: Baywatch Nights Part 1
Ted Vernon is a real piece of shit and, sadly, he’s also our film’s de facto hero. So strap yourself in for the Ted Vernon show and try not to fall asleep. I suggest taking a taser to your own genitals, but I’m a free thinker. An American soldier is sent to Russia to collect … More The Merits of Sin: Zombie Infection (2011) (Russia)
It always amazes me just how much fun I have with films made from scrapping the bottom of the barrel. Monstroid should never be considered entertainment. It’s boring, poorly filmed and has the acting talent of balsa wood that was left out in a thunderstorm. Yet, here I am ready to ramble on about it … More The Merits of Sin: Monstroid aka Monster aka It Came from the Lake aka The Beast from Beyond aka Monster, the Legend that Became a Terror aka Are You Still Reading This? (1980) (USA)
Belzebuth (2017) (Mexico) ***1/2 Shudder: Damn fine Satanic panic horror flick from Mexico lets ya know it’s not fucking around from its opening scene and proceeds to get goofier as it goes on (No. This is not a complaint). Child massacres, an excommunicated priest, an American Paranormal Forensics agent (ok) and a grieving police Lieutenant … More Two From Mexico: Belzebuth (2017) Tigers Are Not Afraid (2017)
I used to be an avid churchgoer, back when I was “born-again.” The years of 2004-2011 consisted of me being holier than thou as I strutted around the youth group or the college group with earrings in my ears like the bad boy of the Evangelicals. It kept me out of trouble, but it made … More Schlock du Jour: The VelociPastor (2018)
